wow,, this is trippy info about how a narcissist's brain works...
"Keenan explained that, "in narcissists, more brain areas are dedicated
to self-deception." So when a narcissist's medial prefrontal cortex is
taken offline, backup generators are in place to maintain that overblown
sense of self."
Gotta read the article to find out more,, it's good..
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/comment/1059680?fbclid=IwAR0QudYeQ90kgLkY3SlKghmTPXD_Tn5NByPv0Z2hUbC8mUUKu4tetyqZnAQ#comment-1059680
Friday, December 28, 2018
THE FROG IN HOT WATER
Abuse
rarely starts full force.. Abusers know that their target will leave if
love bombing isn't applied at the strategic times to keep their victims
believing things will either change back to the wonderfulness of their
courting days, or at least be something to continue fighting for..
None of us invited the abuse, nor do we allow it to continue..
Abuse becomes socially accepted each time a victim is blamed for not second guessing the abuser correctly and staying too long..
We are not alone when we support each other..
None of us invited the abuse, nor do we allow it to continue..
Abuse becomes socially accepted each time a victim is blamed for not second guessing the abuser correctly and staying too long..
We are not alone when we support each other..
Wednesday, December 26, 2018
My ex had two different ways to describe me...
My
ex had two different ways to describe me...
With other people, he praised me,, told people the most complimentary things about me,,, it used to startle me when they'd tell me,, I started crying one time because he had been so horrible for weeks to me,, and here is one of his friends going on about how much he (my ex) loved me,, naming all sorts of things I've done that I'm proud of,, that he'd just heard out of my ex's mouth days before... So while being mean and rage-ful with me at home, he'd been acting like he couldn't live without me to his friends...
............. because at home, he (angrily) described me as angry, argumentative and a bully.. claiming he couldn't work together with me because I was so confusing that my requests were crap...
.. which I always knew he thought would piss me off cuz I'm a trained commercial/graphic artist and make killer schematic diagrams and can write out detailed instructions with all sorts of illustrative precise pictures that I draw up.. (example here) and I'm talking about when I was designing my kitchen,, which at Xmas, he gave me a book on kitchens and he said, as my present; if I designed it, he would build it (he's a handyman by trade and follows other people's instruction perfectly)
But I never did get my Xmas present and my kitchen is still a wreck.. boo hoo...
Confusion is key in abuse..
Writing it down, it's obvious now how praising me was his way of love-bombing the friend to make himself look like the good guy,,,, how he future faked a dream with me, stonewalled the project and then projected onto me exactly what he was doing... at the time, it was devastating
With other people, he praised me,, told people the most complimentary things about me,,, it used to startle me when they'd tell me,, I started crying one time because he had been so horrible for weeks to me,, and here is one of his friends going on about how much he (my ex) loved me,, naming all sorts of things I've done that I'm proud of,, that he'd just heard out of my ex's mouth days before... So while being mean and rage-ful with me at home, he'd been acting like he couldn't live without me to his friends...
............. because at home, he (angrily) described me as angry, argumentative and a bully.. claiming he couldn't work together with me because I was so confusing that my requests were crap...
.. which I always knew he thought would piss me off cuz I'm a trained commercial/graphic artist and make killer schematic diagrams and can write out detailed instructions with all sorts of illustrative precise pictures that I draw up.. (example here) and I'm talking about when I was designing my kitchen,, which at Xmas, he gave me a book on kitchens and he said, as my present; if I designed it, he would build it (he's a handyman by trade and follows other people's instruction perfectly)
But I never did get my Xmas present and my kitchen is still a wreck.. boo hoo...
Confusion is key in abuse..
Writing it down, it's obvious now how praising me was his way of love-bombing the friend to make himself look like the good guy,,,, how he future faked a dream with me, stonewalled the project and then projected onto me exactly what he was doing... at the time, it was devastating
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